Wednesday, June 30, 2010

LOOKING BACK OVER MY SHOULDER

Well, tour is over, England are out and Pearl Jam have been and gone. So what is there to look forward to?

Not having a job I have to find things to fill my time, although finding a job should be up there near the top. I am attempting to get the George and Lynne book published, albeit with a great deal of procrastination, but here are some things which make life pretty cool.

Red Dead Redemption - How brilliant is this game? I'll tell you: bribrilliant. You ride around on a horse and help or shoot people depending on your mood, and you try and kill your old mate too.

Alex's wedding and stag do - There are a lot of weddings to go to when you hit your 30s but it's rare that one of your really close friends has one, so that should be a hoot.

New albums from Tool and My Chemical Romance - Who knows when these will come out but I'm looking forward to them. Who knows what's happening with MCR though. The album was meant to be out by now but they've sacked the drummer and gone back to the studio. This can only mean that the record company didn't like what they were given and asked them to do it again. Why couldn't they do that with football? - sorry England that wasn't good enough, go and do it again. This leads me to believe that this World Cup was the football equivalent of England's experimental album. They released a host of singles before the World Cup with a new producer, but inexplicably none of these appeared on the album. Instead the album was 70 minutes of drone rock, akin to Lou Reed's Metal Machine Music, and featured no guitar (Wayne Rooney). The fans were confused and didn't buy the record. it sold very poorly and the record company were not happy. They blamed the producer but he was locked out of the final recording sessions. He insists they have loads of hits in them and will release a pop album next time.

Predators - Woah!

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

WORLDWIDE TOUR OF FINLAND

Tomorrow I will be embarking on tour.

This is not a football tour when you go to one place with 13 other men and drink. No, this is a proper tour. I will be driving the great Jeff Klein on his UK tour on these dates:

Thur 17 UK, Bath Moles
Sun 20 UK, Brighton Freebutt
Mon 21 UK, London Borderline
Tues 22 UK, Newcastle Cluny
Wed 23 UK, Sheffield The Forum


Whoever booked Newcastle the day after London didn't know me, or didn't like me. The free dates are being spent at my house, so not that rock 'n' roll. I did vote for extra nights in Bath and Brighton, but I'm not paying for this so I don't get a say.

What else will I do? Well there should be some free time in Bath, Brighton and Sheffield so I get to see those cities. I will probably be asked to man the merch stall, and maybe there will be some drinks. But who knows. I look forward to fun, easy going company and mournful songs.

I will take my camera, and my polaroid if the film hasn't disintegrated, and hopefully there should be some fun snaps to be had.

Tuesday, June 01, 2010

I'M AFRAID OF EVERYONE

Fears and being British combine in the most irritating of ways.

I have a moderate fear of using the phone. It's not to do with germs or technology, more to do with low self confidence that I believe whoever I phone won't actually want to talk to me, but enough of that. So if you think I don't phone you because I don't want to, it's not true. I just think you don't like me.

I am British and therefore have a tendency not to complain about things unless it's really bad. I did however tell some loud men to 'lower your voices' at a comedy club. I got the phrase from The Darjeeling Limited and it worked a treat. Afterwards I didn't feel empowered though, more afraid they would be muttering rude things about me behind my back.

So let's add these two things together. I have ordered an item and it is 'lost' at the moment so I have to call the people in charge. Firstly I have to find the courage to pick up the phone, then I have to complain that my item is somewhere no one knows. The most British thing here is, at the end of it when the lady apologises for my inconvenience, I tell her it's not a problem! Of course it's a problem. I've just gone through my own personal hell to find out nothing.

I am also afraid of having my haircut and approaching women. So phoning up for hair appointments or asking women out for dates is even more painful than complaining. And believe me, I will never complain about a haircut.

P.S. The item isn't embarrassing; it's not a sex toy or anything. It's a Beatles guitar controller for my newly bought PS3. And I wonder why I'm single.