Monday, January 04, 2010


It was difficult to sleep last night due to the impending return to school, yes I am afraid of children. I can't remember all of the dream I had but one part of it was quite sinister and very film trailerish.

I was at my parent's house and they were leaving to go somewhere in the night and I was left alone. One of my duties was to make sure the cat went out and not run upstairs, like a cat I had when I was young used to do. I was locking the door when part of it broke off and the cat ran out. It had some sort of loose latch. I had to find the cat which then jumped up at the conservatory window. Finally I got it inside, fixed the door and shut it in the kitchen.

As I left the kitchen a small black boy dressed in white pyjamas came down the stairs and into the hall. I had never seen the boy before and was very shocked. I asked him who he was and why he was here but he gave me no answer. I asked him if he knew the phone number of his parents and he gave me this long number which ended in 'nickel formula'. I didn't know what those words meant with regard to a phone number but he showed me what to press as there were some strange keys on the telephone. For some reason and I don't know how, I found out that this actually set a timer for a bomb going inside the child. Apparently people/aliens were tricking families into taking in foster children wired with bombs and a certain phone number would set the bombs off.

Nickel Formula, coming this Summer.

Sunday, January 03, 2010


Usually when a new year begins people make all sorts of wild resolutions that they insist they will follow. "I will give up smoking!" "I will get Audrey to marry me!" "I will only play World Of Warcraft on weekends!" "I will wash my socks!"

I will not be making any new year's resolutions. No, I am not perfect but I will not be henpecked by society (calm down, it's only January) into making changes at this time. Let us wait for an epiphany to change our lives. Epiphanies certainly do not happen at 5.45am on the tube home, thank you TfL, on the 1st January. They happen at arbitrary times and, if not arbitrary, usually on your birthday. Best do them when your doctor tells you, or you lose another girl/boyfriend for picking your nose and eating it.

Also, I won't make them because I won't keep them. I am now far too set in my ways to do anything different to what I do now. What is the point of saying I will go for a bike ride every Saturday when I won't be able to commit to it. I would like to go on more bike rides, who knows what it looks like round the back of my flat, but other things will always be deemed more important, and take preference.

If I do have one resolution it is to not give up. Yet.