Wednesday, June 30, 2010

LOOKING BACK OVER MY SHOULDER

Well, tour is over, England are out and Pearl Jam have been and gone. So what is there to look forward to?

Not having a job I have to find things to fill my time, although finding a job should be up there near the top. I am attempting to get the George and Lynne book published, albeit with a great deal of procrastination, but here are some things which make life pretty cool.

Red Dead Redemption - How brilliant is this game? I'll tell you: bribrilliant. You ride around on a horse and help or shoot people depending on your mood, and you try and kill your old mate too.

Alex's wedding and stag do - There are a lot of weddings to go to when you hit your 30s but it's rare that one of your really close friends has one, so that should be a hoot.

New albums from Tool and My Chemical Romance - Who knows when these will come out but I'm looking forward to them. Who knows what's happening with MCR though. The album was meant to be out by now but they've sacked the drummer and gone back to the studio. This can only mean that the record company didn't like what they were given and asked them to do it again. Why couldn't they do that with football? - sorry England that wasn't good enough, go and do it again. This leads me to believe that this World Cup was the football equivalent of England's experimental album. They released a host of singles before the World Cup with a new producer, but inexplicably none of these appeared on the album. Instead the album was 70 minutes of drone rock, akin to Lou Reed's Metal Machine Music, and featured no guitar (Wayne Rooney). The fans were confused and didn't buy the record. it sold very poorly and the record company were not happy. They blamed the producer but he was locked out of the final recording sessions. He insists they have loads of hits in them and will release a pop album next time.

Predators - Woah!

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

WORLDWIDE TOUR OF FINLAND

Tomorrow I will be embarking on tour.

This is not a football tour when you go to one place with 13 other men and drink. No, this is a proper tour. I will be driving the great Jeff Klein on his UK tour on these dates:

Thur 17 UK, Bath Moles
Sun 20 UK, Brighton Freebutt
Mon 21 UK, London Borderline
Tues 22 UK, Newcastle Cluny
Wed 23 UK, Sheffield The Forum


Whoever booked Newcastle the day after London didn't know me, or didn't like me. The free dates are being spent at my house, so not that rock 'n' roll. I did vote for extra nights in Bath and Brighton, but I'm not paying for this so I don't get a say.

What else will I do? Well there should be some free time in Bath, Brighton and Sheffield so I get to see those cities. I will probably be asked to man the merch stall, and maybe there will be some drinks. But who knows. I look forward to fun, easy going company and mournful songs.

I will take my camera, and my polaroid if the film hasn't disintegrated, and hopefully there should be some fun snaps to be had.

Tuesday, June 01, 2010

I'M AFRAID OF EVERYONE

Fears and being British combine in the most irritating of ways.

I have a moderate fear of using the phone. It's not to do with germs or technology, more to do with low self confidence that I believe whoever I phone won't actually want to talk to me, but enough of that. So if you think I don't phone you because I don't want to, it's not true. I just think you don't like me.

I am British and therefore have a tendency not to complain about things unless it's really bad. I did however tell some loud men to 'lower your voices' at a comedy club. I got the phrase from The Darjeeling Limited and it worked a treat. Afterwards I didn't feel empowered though, more afraid they would be muttering rude things about me behind my back.

So let's add these two things together. I have ordered an item and it is 'lost' at the moment so I have to call the people in charge. Firstly I have to find the courage to pick up the phone, then I have to complain that my item is somewhere no one knows. The most British thing here is, at the end of it when the lady apologises for my inconvenience, I tell her it's not a problem! Of course it's a problem. I've just gone through my own personal hell to find out nothing.

I am also afraid of having my haircut and approaching women. So phoning up for hair appointments or asking women out for dates is even more painful than complaining. And believe me, I will never complain about a haircut.

P.S. The item isn't embarrassing; it's not a sex toy or anything. It's a Beatles guitar controller for my newly bought PS3. And I wonder why I'm single.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

ARBEIT MACHT FREI

I am currently (sort of) unemployed. I work part time from home for my old company which takes me approximately a full day a week with a spattering of email answering and fingering the pulse but apart from that I have no job.

At present my argument is that I don't need one. I get a small income from the above work, my mortgage is the lowest it can be without the bank paying me and I have a relatively healthy bank account. I don't have an extravagant lifestyle, although I have spent more money on goods and services recently than I did when I was working full time.

So in brief, I can get by without a job at the moment. I have yet to even try to find one, although I don't want a full time job right now, more like temping, so I don't know how easy/difficult it is. I fell into one job and stayed there for 8 years so I'm a bit alien to the process.

As soon as the PS3 and Beatles Rock Band arrives, it will be firmly forgotten about. Then there's the World Cup. So, shall we say mid July to start the job hunting?

Favourite songs in the world right now:

Circa Survive - Imaginary Enemy
The National - England
Minus The Bear - My Time

Thursday, May 20, 2010

PLANES

Back from holiday and I noticed one thing about people - they can be very obnoxious. Evidence of this is as follows:

A man who was amazed that his lunch in a Tunisian restaurant didn't come with a sauce, and then almost guffawed at the absurdity of being offered ketchup.
People who unbuckle their seat belt as soon as the plane has landed.
A man who decided to get on his phone before he got off the plane. Yes I know it probably does nothing to the electronics but there are rules.

I am very surprised in the new Circa Survive album, mainly because it is essentially a straight up rock record. A combination of third album maturity and a major label deal no doubt.

Monday, May 10, 2010

I CUT LIKE A BUFFALO

Despite having two massive framed posters on my living room (lounge?) walls, I've never been a massive fan of The White Stripes. I love what they do, how they look and what they stand for, but as far as songs go, they aren't that great. I'll never pay to see them in concert and I haven't bought any of their albums.

However I do like Jack White. I think he's incredibly talented and it's only the White Stripes limitations that have meant that he isn't seen as one of the greatest guitarists of our generation. If the songs he produced with them were of the standard of say The Strokes or another band of that ilk, then he may be lauded more, not that he isn't lauded.

I liked The Raconteurs more than the White Stripes in terms of songs but the albums got tired more quickly than I would have liked. I especially liked the quick release of the second album. Sod it, let's not dither on an album for 4 months. It's done, it's done and no summer/autumn/winter market will make an album like that sell more or less. Get it out.

Now we have The Dead Weather, whom I now think are great. I may be an album behind but I'm right into it. They are probably the best thing that Jack White has put his name to, even though he's officially the drummer but you're trying to tell me the solo in 60 Feet Tall isn't him. Not only that but they have the wonderful Alison Mosshart. Wasted in the Kills with the toothpick shagging Jamie Hince, she gets to shine, all sultry and dirty like she should do.

In conclusion: Jack White is great but has only just found the medium to show it.

Saturday, May 08, 2010

I AM EVIL

What can I say about The National? The show at the Royal Albert Hall on Thursday was quite phenomenal. The way the songs built into crescendos, the instruments swelling around you. Many people complain that the Albert Hall isn't suited to rock bands but after only half a song, it was perfect. The highlight of course was Matt Berninger's walkabout during Mr November, which took him literally over our seats.

It was gig of the year and the first of the summer (Summer? The heating's on for christ's sake) which promises to be a busy June. Coming up, we have Woven Hand, Rage Against The Machine, Murder By Death, Stone Temple Pilots and Pearl Jam with Bad Religion in August.

I found the election fascinating. It was great staying up until 4 playing email tennis with Chester commenting on everything. It would have been better if we watched it together. Who knows, there'll probably be another on in a year's time. Dimbleby was brilliant as well, commanding everyone around him. Nick Robinson may be political editor and Paxman the snarling Rottweiler, but both knelt at Dimbleby's feet.

Finally Twitter had a purpose with some funny quips from the likes of David Schneider, but unfortunately with very few followers myself, no one read my comments. I have to leave that for Facebook. And so after all that, I'm now interested in politics. I know not whether it will last, but how can you not be fascinated by it all at the moment?

Thursday, May 06, 2010

WE HAVE THE FACTS AND WE'RE VOTING YES

This Facebook election day is really weirding me out.

How strange it is that people are not only stating they are voting and then saying who they are voting for on Facebook. It is meant to be a secret ballot.

The most alarming thing is the amount of vitriol being thrown at various parties, and specifically their leaders, by people who probably don't usually follow politics at all.

A few examples:

A friend of mine sent me a document called Why The Tories Are Evil.
There's a group on Facebook called National Not Voting Conservative Day.
And another called We Got Rage To Number 1, We Can Get Lib Dems To Number 10.

Status updates:
Please don't vote that Tory c.nt in today...for fucks sake people...I don't want to have to look at is face for the next four years...

Come on Britain, send Mr Potato Head back to Witney with his tail between his legs...
Please.

I do think it's very important to vote, even if your proposed party of choice has no chance of winning the seat where you live. In my eyes, if you don't vote, you don't get to complain. However, can we please calm down. The country is not going to fall to its knees (although it did recently) whoever wins. People hated Thatcher but she managed to stay in power for an impressive amount of time, same with Tony Blair.

I will be voting this evening, but keeping my vote to myself because it is my right to do so, but mainly through fear of a vehement attack from my peers.

Tuesday, May 04, 2010

MR FOOL FOOLISH

Due to my unemployment I decided to sync my Facebook with my Spotify with my iTunes. Then, for some reason, Spotify decided that it didn't like what I called most of the songs on my iTunes and renamed them, the artist or the album, or in some cases all three.

So 5 years of diligent and meticulous database management was flushed down the shitter like, well like anything that goes down the shitter.

I had planned no to update my ipod until I had sorted it out, but considering it took all of yesterday for those bastards to do it automatically, it's probably best I didn't.

So now there's a load of songs missing in action on my iTunes. It's like they faked their own death in Vietnam and then took the name of their dead captain and are hiding in this city. I'll track you down, your family just want to know you're safe.

AND THEY WOULD NOT STOP SCREAMING

As you get older you have to answer the question: Do the hangovers get worse or can your body not take it anymore?

To be fair to my body, who isn't talking to me right now, I beat the crap out of it over the extended weekend (what is actually extended when you don't work?). I drank a lot on Friday night and then had a chicken kebab. On Saturday I had an acceptable number of pints and then on Sunday had two pizzas and a load of booze ending with rum and something at 3am. Yesterday was awful and I still ache now.

But it's not the physical pain that worsens but the mental one. When you have a lack of sleep and a shit load of depressants, because that is essentially what booze is, you feel like rubbish in your mind too. So instead of just feeling rubbish yesterday, I still feel rubbish today. Boo.

Maybe I'll have a can of delicious Strongbow for lunch.

pic courtesy of Jesse who always looks like she's having more fun than me.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

YOU TOLD ME FORTUNES

Fuck it let's make it a diary. I don't intend to write here a lot and I will undoubtedly go days and weeks without posting, but from now on if something is on my mind, or I want to not visit Facebook (how are people not addicted to it - maybe they have people to talk to), I will write something.

So in age old fashion, let's do it as a list.

1. Watched Synth Britannia programme and have been listening to New ORder, Depeche Mode and strangely the new/latest Editors album. I dismissed it initially but there's 4 really god songs on there. For a 9 track album,that isn't a bad return.

2. Sometimes you get excited about an album that's about to come out. You liked the previous one. Then you liked it more. Then you heard they were bringing out a new one and you get into the old one more. Then you get into the first song and it grows and grows until you're playing it on repeat really loud and the album is still a month or so away. Then you feel like this new album, that you haven't heard yet, could be very important to you. It could be the album that changes you.

At the moment I feel like that with The Gaslight Anthem. While The '59 Sound was good, it did have the song The '59 Sound which is one of the best songs ever made. It's in the top 20, maybe the top 10 (a list that changes but needs to be made). It could be amazing this new one. But do albums ever live up to the expectation? It will either be not good enough and therefore a disappointment or you'll think initially it's the best thing ever, much like many did with Be Here Now and 21st Century Breakdown. These are not great albums, but they aren't awful albums. They are just not 5 star albums. More like 3 star. If Be Here Now was awarded universal 3 stars then it wouldn't have been slated so dramatically those years later.

I'm sure Alex would think High Violet will be his life changer, but I'm going with American Slang. Fingers crossed.

3. I also watched Mesrine parts 1 & 2 and I implore anyone and everyone to do the same. Blah blah French Goodfellas blah. Not really, just impeccable acting from Vincent Cassel. Probably the world's finest at the moment.

4. Thinking about how to go about getting George and Lynne Explained published. I suppose I need to go to the copyright holders, but I don't want to tell them too much otherwise they could close the website like that. I won't mention the website but send them a couple of examples to see what they think.

5. Having panicked about the prospect of another weekend on my own, it now looks like I'll be doing something Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Praise be the lord.

Friday, April 23, 2010

FED TO THE OCEAN


I varnished myself inside so I can't go out to get food. If only I would allow myself a takeaway I could be eating something nice this evening. Instead I am having sausages in tomato sauce with pasta. Beaucoup de sel, je pense. And three cans of Strongbow.

I have neglected the Hughesie Times blog as it was meant to document the mundane and although what I have been doing recently has been downright dull, it is quite interesting that I'm doing it. So I'm not going to document that.

Was going to write something about a girl, but it would be pointless. I'll vent that to the next person who enquires after my well-being - lucky you!


Monday, April 19, 2010

COMICS

There are many ways to pass the time but one of the best so far are the specific Tumblr blogs that deal with a certain topic. My favourite at the moment is Comically Vintage which posts panels and covers of old comics which are completely absurd in either their ideas or dialogue.

There also seems to be a lot of spanking by Superman in the 60s, which really must have hurt.


Sunday, February 28, 2010

AND THAT'S THE END OF THAT CHAPTER

Survey


iTunes survey

Open up your iTunes & fill out this survey.

How many songs total: 13162

How many hours or days of music: 36 days, 7 hours, 16 minutes and 3 seconds

First Artist: A

Last Artist: !!!

Sort By Song Title:
First Song: A-Punk - Vampire Weekend
Last Song: - Stephen Fretwell

Shortest Song: Christopher Walken - Cock Of The Walk Baby (1 second)
Longest Song: Glassjaw - Live at Brixton (1hr 23mins 28 secs)
First Album: Aaliyah - Aaliyah
Last Album: 90125 - Yes

Top two Most Played Songs
Paramore - Decode
Arctic Monkeys - Cornerstone

First Song That Comes Up On Shuffle: The Rolling Stones - Can't You Hear Me Knocking


Search The Following & State How Many Songs Come Up:
Death – 176
Life – 201
Love – 576
Hate – 57
You – 1365
Sex – 49

Thursday, February 18, 2010

WOMAN ON WOMAN ACTION

Why have Rolling Stone put a couple of lesbians on the cover? Subtitle: 'Why we love Ellen DeGenres (or however you spell it)'

Monday, January 04, 2010

DREAMS CAN COME TRUE

It was difficult to sleep last night due to the impending return to school, yes I am afraid of children. I can't remember all of the dream I had but one part of it was quite sinister and very film trailerish.

I was at my parent's house and they were leaving to go somewhere in the night and I was left alone. One of my duties was to make sure the cat went out and not run upstairs, like a cat I had when I was young used to do. I was locking the door when part of it broke off and the cat ran out. It had some sort of loose latch. I had to find the cat which then jumped up at the conservatory window. Finally I got it inside, fixed the door and shut it in the kitchen.

As I left the kitchen a small black boy dressed in white pyjamas came down the stairs and into the hall. I had never seen the boy before and was very shocked. I asked him who he was and why he was here but he gave me no answer. I asked him if he knew the phone number of his parents and he gave me this long number which ended in 'nickel formula'. I didn't know what those words meant with regard to a phone number but he showed me what to press as there were some strange keys on the telephone. For some reason and I don't know how, I found out that this actually set a timer for a bomb going inside the child. Apparently people/aliens were tricking families into taking in foster children wired with bombs and a certain phone number would set the bombs off.

Nickel Formula, coming this Summer.

Sunday, January 03, 2010

SO THIS IS THE NEW YEAR

Usually when a new year begins people make all sorts of wild resolutions that they insist they will follow. "I will give up smoking!" "I will get Audrey to marry me!" "I will only play World Of Warcraft on weekends!" "I will wash my socks!"

I will not be making any new year's resolutions. No, I am not perfect but I will not be henpecked by society (calm down, it's only January) into making changes at this time. Let us wait for an epiphany to change our lives. Epiphanies certainly do not happen at 5.45am on the tube home, thank you TfL, on the 1st January. They happen at arbitrary times and, if not arbitrary, usually on your birthday. Best do them when your doctor tells you, or you lose another girl/boyfriend for picking your nose and eating it.

Also, I won't make them because I won't keep them. I am now far too set in my ways to do anything different to what I do now. What is the point of saying I will go for a bike ride every Saturday when I won't be able to commit to it. I would like to go on more bike rides, who knows what it looks like round the back of my flat, but other things will always be deemed more important, and take preference.

If I do have one resolution it is to not give up. Yet.